The Online Association of Photographers: If Other Professions Were Treated Like Photography…

Monday, 28 March 2016

If Other Professions Were Treated Like Photography…

everyonesaphotographermain

A lot of professional photographers have a growing frustration about losing jobs to part-time “photographers” doing horrible work for $30, or having clients tell them that another “photographer” will do the same job for $25. So, I got to thinking: what if other professions were treated like photography?

Here’s what a “part-time professional’s” Facebook posts might look like if other careers experienced the “everyone’s a photographer” phenomenon:

Musician

I forgot to mention that I was given an old accordion a while back, so if anyone is looking for live music for an event, I’m available for $30/hr. But not just accordion music – I know friends with pretty much any type of musical instrument you can name – so I figure i can do it all. And I also sing. Not professionally, but you know, good enough to my ear, so let me get at me!

Dentist

I just bought an awesome set of pro dental picks, so I thought I’d throw it out there and see if anyone want’s some dental work done, let me know.

I’m not totally professional, and i didn’t go to school for it or anything, and i got the tools to work on tiny parts in plastic modelling, but if you don’t want to pay the crazy rates full-time dentists charge, just contact me. I can work on you or your kids’ teeth after hours and on weekends. I’m just starting out on this, so I’m happy to do it for free.

Massage Therapist

So we were at Shoppers Drug Mart today just before they closed and there was a sale on baby oil, so I bought 6 bottles, and I thought I’d throw it out there to see if anyone wants a massage.

I’ve never done it before, and haven’t spent any time gaining experience so my rates are low – just $15/hr. But if you don’t want to pay the crazy rates that actual trained RMTs charge, just contact me! I’ll even throw in all the back scratching you want for a flat fee of $8.

Firefighter

I was just downstairs and found a totally awesome bucket that I didn’t even know we had.

I also have awesomely reliable plumbing, so I thought I’d throw it out there and see if anyone who is sick of paying outrageous taxes to pay for unnecessary things like “professional fire fighters” who have training and experience, why not just call me if you discover a house fire. I’ll come over when I can, and bring my bucket filled with water. I’m new, and don’t really have a lot of experience, so no charge!

Personal Trainer

So a couple of weeks back Sarah dragged me back to the gym for the first time in years. We got sick after a couple of times, but we went back again this week so now I have got some awesome experience with almost half the machines at Goodlife. So if you want help getting in shape but don’t want to pay the crazy prices personal trainers charge just because they have experience, and like, actual muscles – just let me know.

I’m new and just looking to ‘get my name out there’ so I’m happy to stand beside you while you do your workout while holding a clipboard and nodding, while occasionally yelling something vaguely motivational at you all for free, just as long as you credit me on all your Instagram gym selfies.

Grocery Store

I just realized we have a lot of old stuff in our refrigerator. Most of it looks kinda sketchy, but I’m thinking food companies put expiry dates on their stuff that aren’t really reasonable, and that in reality, we probably have a lot more time then they say.

So if you hate paying the insane prices supermarkets charge for their “unopened” and “fresh” products, why not stop by the house and take a look at the stuff we have here. Why pay almost $5 for a new bottle of YumYum pickles, when we have one that is almost 3/4 full that we only bought in 2014 for just $0.99? All kinds of deals here. Check it out!

Model

So I mentioned in a previous post that I started going to the gym again recently, and have taken up personal training. I was just looking in the mirror and I think I can see a bit of improvement, and the scale tells me I’ve gained 2 pounds (it must be muscle!).

So I just wanted to throw it out there to all the awesome local photographers who are looking for models, but who don’t want to pay the outrageous booking fees of agency models with actual ‘hard’ bodies, why not hire me for all your male boudoir needs? I’m new so I only want credit on the photographs when you post them here on Facebook.

I can also totally bring munchies for if you want – my fridge is loaded, and I’m happy to give you my pickle!

Oh, and if after the shoot you’re tired from standing so long and working with those wobbly $30 eBay stands you use and the umbrellas that go with them, or if you’re stressed out because your second hand camera died or you forgot to bring a second memory card, no worries – because I can totally offer you a massage at a great rate.

And hey, don’t worry if this idea gets you too hot, because did I mention I have a bucket?

Accountant

A friend just sent me a note about all the posts I’ve been making about my new career options and said “What, are you in grade school again!??”

I’m not sure, but if I’m being honest, I think they might have meant it as an insult, but it reminded me that I did, in fact, do grade school and while there, I did almost 10 years of math. I even did a couple of years in high school!

So, like, I’m not a professional with numbers or anything, but if your business is sick of paying insane amounts to actual accountants, why not give me a call.

I’m not really a fan of all those ratios and formulas and “official tax regulations” – but I like to consider myself a ‘natural number accountant’, so I will totally add up all the money you made this year and subtract all the stuff you spent money on for you for free, as long as you agree to put a link to my webpage on your company’s website.

About the author: Brent McCombs is a fashion, glamour, and wedding photographer based in beautiful Halifax, Nova Scotia. You can visit his website here.